I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
