i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
