i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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