I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
