she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
