Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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