2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
