eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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