I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
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A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
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I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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