with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
