That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Randomize
