WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize
