is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
this will be a night to untag.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Found the puke drawer
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Randomize
