Jerry, you need to find god
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
honey bunches of taint.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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