you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
