Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize