it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Success! We fucked roommates!
Randomize
