no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
