He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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