cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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