Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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