I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
