Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
