Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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