not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
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