She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
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He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
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I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers