dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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