good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
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If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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