Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
