I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Randomize