I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize