is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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