He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
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