I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize