Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
