good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
