he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
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