There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
