Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I think people are normalizing furries
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
