we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
what the fuck happened to the tacos
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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