if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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