I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
