there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
