i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Randomize
