he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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