i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize
