What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
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