Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize