Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
