I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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