I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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