I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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